Monday, February 28, 2011

Despite articles by the New York Times theorizing about a future [url=http://nyti.ms/eizUGN]post-racial America[/url] and diversity offices on elite liberal arts colleges, racism on college campuses is alive and well. Reading this article on Refuse the Silence, an organization devoted to documenting the silences around racism and sexism on these campuses, this revelation is no surprise. However, in popular media and the emerging face of social media, racist incidents on campuses are still often [url=http://bit.ly/foPcxQ]overlooked[/url]. I spend a majority of my free time looking up relevant articles that affect my experience as a women of color in America and my own college campus, and finding coverage of these incidents is still difficult . The silence that pervades the racism and sexism on college campuses is because these incidents are then institutionally reinforced by campuses that don’t take these incidents seriously enough.

My Junior Year of High School I went on a special “diversity weekend” trip organized by my school to Penn State. As a 17 year old, the pluses were it was far enough, a large campus and I’d heard promising things about their liberal arts programs. Within an hour of being on the campus I‘d decided I didn’t want to return, despite that it had already been intoned that the combination of my race, good grades and financial situation would lead to a hefty scholarship. This was for two reasons. The first was our guide briefly mentioning a recent [url=http://bit.ly/gC0Nqq] racist incident[/url] involving the Penn State College Republicans group on campus throwing a Halloween party in which a number of students dressed up as KKK members. The second was the stares from multiple groups of white students on campus at our tour group of ten; more specifically our guide’s response that, “It’s probably because they haven’t seen this many of us walking around in a group ever.” I realized by ‘us’ she meant women of color and that she wasn’t making a sarcastic joke in calling our relatively small group of ten large.

Since this decision, I’ve researched other incidents of racism on Penn State’s campus that have gone relatively unacknowledged and that weekend has affected the rest of my college career. I consciously decided to not attend a small or predominantly white campus because I realized that it wasn’t an environment I would be able to thrive and grow in the ways that I needed to. However, that was my personal decision; as many students of color that [url=http://bit.ly/hye3Ta]transfer out[/url] of these campuses, there’s also inspiring stories of student’s [url=http://bit.ly/boYzkn]fighting back[/url].

Incidentally, despite my attempts to attend a campus that was racially diverse and enforced a zero tolerance policy about campus racism, I still found myself entrenched in a debate about the racism of a campus televised [url=http://bit.ly/dSl2AG]black face incident[/url]. I’ve linked the SUNY Purchase paper issue that came out during these debates over freedom of speech vs. racial sensitivity, but that is all that you will find if you google this. The incident in question including a white student dressing in black face to ‘mock’ another student who happened to be Black, his use of the N-word and use of racist rhetoric to posit Black men as hypersexualized rapists, ended with the student’s temporary suspension.

In the end, whether you go to a campus known for it’s liberal atmosphere or one with a history of racist incidents, makes no difference. Until college campuses make a concerted effort to deal disparities in campus life imbued with racism and policies that silence marginalized groups, the choice of more diverse vs. less diverse will most likely change nothing. And if they won’t, then reading stories about other people of color who have fought back against campus racism will hopefully be the light at the end of the tunnel and spur all of us to take a stand.

Monday, September 13, 2010

i've been making lots of soups lately-and making lists of goals/things I want/need in my life to feel a little bit more sane than I've been. A little bit more okay than I've been lately. It's working for the most part. workschoolworkschoolworkschool. i need less drama more alone ok time. band practice has been pretty good.

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seeing you is like feeling like i'm home wherever I am. that's scary sometimes.

when i wonder if you're escaping southbound and maybe being with someone else who's waiting out there i feel like i'm going to puke. probably because this would be the second time that's happened to me without me knowing.


Thursday, April 22, 2010

nothing.everything.

it's been so long. It's not that I forgot, more that the longer I waited the more I had to talk about and put into perspective. Sometimes it feels like this whole past year has been one long dialogue between myself and everyone else in my life, when maybe it should have been a monologue. The past couple of months have been an endless stream of skipping class, stumbling into work everyday, traveling to other cities-not in escape, but out of opportunity and in the end necessity. I have all these projects on my plate. SUMMER will arrive soon and I want to A: go on vacation B: finish my projects and C:start filling my school time which will be empty until Fall again, with an internship/volunteer position I care about;taking care of my health again;getting this band off the ground(by the time a drummer even enters the picture we'll already have 5-7 songs).
I can smell summer around the corner already and ever since my snowy, cold new orleans vacation I've refused to wear pants; only shorts//dresses with leggings.
staying up late, it makes me feel like it's summer already, and I will mess up my sheets with the grimy sweat and suntan lotion that will perpetually cover me once it hits 80+ everyday.

'cannibal gays, that, like, eat children'- I just overheard this outside my window. late spring thursday night.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

sometimes it seems like I'm always going to be stuck with you leaving and me staying.i just hope that when it gets to be more of that than what it is now, I can cut my losses and walk away while I'm ahead. while I don't feel more for you than I should start feeling.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I really need to stop reading my horoscope from this site-it's trying to turn me into a hippie.

Wednesday Sep 16, 2009

The muse is crawling up your spine, and dancing with your brain. Take advantage of today’s explosive creative energies. Be experimental with your hands: write, splat paint, play slide guitar or press rhinestones around your eyelids. You could also surprise your true love with a tray of Peruvian-Japanese fusion sushi rolls. Either way, get carried away with imaginative experimentation and play. There’s no such thing as going too far or being too much.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

SUMMER//FALL

the west coast<>east coast mind meld was a perfect end of summer. It was everything full circle from where I left it last August to move back, except this FALL I'll be in New York and getting started on all the things I should have started last Fall, but instead let myself get side tracked in other people's ideas and dreams for me. I don't want that anymore, I want to be productive in myself, it seems as if I'm always trying to work with other people on projects and it slows me down; weighs me down. I'm so excited for this Fall.

SF was amazing, I saw all the people I missed and met new friends to miss in the future, new friends to visit too and be pen pals with. when I was there we talked about how sad it is that pen pal culture that was so vital in riot grrl in the 90's is virtually dead now: I hate that, I'm bringing pen pal buddies back! starting this Fall. I'm psyched on all the care packages and little projects I have whirling around in my head to send all buddies-if I can get my tape player fixed, mix tapes will be part of that too. Classes start next Monday-I'm excited to do that again and get working in the bakery again.

ALL Y'ALL FALL:

-pickle/kimchi/sauerkraut MAKING! FERMENTATION-yay!
-Christeen is gonna teach me all about SOUPS
-earl grey tea with vanilla soy milk
-veganism:giving it a second chance
-tarot card/ferris wheel/top 5 zine
-women of color in punk zine
-sketching stuff
-building up a skateboard-to SKATE with!
-playing bass in a totally awesome lady band!
-making mixtapes/sending care packages
--writing lettersss and pen pal-ing
-making best friend patches
-learning book binding techniques
-bi-coastal book list mind meld
-visiting the west coast again sooner than later.

<3

Thursday, June 25, 2009

this whole month has been a shit storm, a horrible start to being 23. I can't wait for July, I can only hope that things improve by then. so much for endless summer, it barely feels like summer since it's been raining so on and off and all facets of my life have pretty much been fucked by incidents that I had no control and actions that were someone elses. I just want to leave again, before I know it this summer that I've been looking to all year will be over and school will start again, and at least there's something comforting in that. life is hell.hell is life.